I do often think about how the origin of “he would not fucking say that” was in reference to a post which depicted Cartman SouthPark responding politely when asked for his pronouns
meme phrases are so mobile and versatile and that’s really really beautiful but i’m always thinking about the first “she x on my y til i z” being “she ebbin on my neezer til i scrooge” and the first “fork found in kitchen” coming from a tweet about sehun from exo being spotted at a gay bar. like sometimes you just utterly nail it the very first time and no variation of the joke is going to be better.
i’m just continually shocked by how many people on this website do not consume any art or media by black people. if you are into almost any genre of popular music at all you have to go out of your way to do that
“acab includes fandom police” “acab includes bossy people” “acab includes-” no it doesnt. no it fucking doesnt. there is a way for you to express your disapproval of a group without equating it to the government sponsored institution that loves to torture and kill black people
the first chapter of Moby Dick rewritten in tiresome modern idiom
CHAPTER 1. Loomings.
Call me Ishmael. Some years ago - it’s none of your business how many - being mostly broke, and bored with the land part of the world, I thought I would sail around a little and look at the watery part of the world. I’m probably the most mentally healthy person you know. Whenever I feel my face getting grim; whenever it is a damp, drizzly November in my soul; whenever I find myself accidentally reading the ads in the window of funeral homes, and following funeral processions through traffic; and especially when I’m hangry, and only my extremely strong moral principles stop me from deliberately going out in public and methodically slapping people’s earbuds out - then I know it’s high time to get to sea, ASAP. This is my substitute for getting in fights. I’m too mentally healthy to kill myself; I quietly and considerately put myself on a ship and sail myself away instead. There is nothing surprising in this. Everyone feels exactly the same way, and if they don’t, they’re lying.
You think I’m lying? Exhibit A: a city. Go to your local coastal city. Everyone is looking at the water. They drive over from other neighborhoods just to come to the water. They make a day of it. They’re not doing anything, they’re just staring at the ocean. Why? Is it because they all work office jobs? No! Here come more of them! They cram themselves up to the edge of the water and stare at it. WHAT DO THEY WANT? WHAT ARE THEY LOOKING AT. Perhaps the ships themselves all packed together, each one with several compasses on it, creates some kind of critical mass - all of the small compass-magnets on all the ships in the harbor combining into one really big magnetic field - and the people get sucked into the field and trapped there. That’s science.
Exhibit 2: the countryside with lakes in it. Every path you follow in the countryside brings you to some water, such as a stream. There is magic in it. If you take your standard fool with ADHD dissociating in the middle of a supermarket and put them outside and give them a shove, they’ll automatically lead you to water (if there is any nearby) (try it). Another good experiment to try is to get lost in the great American desert in a caravan supplied with a metaphysical professor! Try it in the great American desert at home!
Yes, as everyone knows, meditation and water are a match made in heaven. Married forever. That’s science.
I have a question: the original Moby Dick, in its original linguistic and cultural context (you know all the dick jokes in Shakespeare that we don’t pick up on any more because language has shifted? That kind of thing), was it THAT clear that the narrator has Something Wrong with him?
